I am convinced God, the Almighty whatever name you chose to call “The Higher Power” created marriage for only one reason — to teach one another how to love.  Each human is very much flawed.

And we are all sinners.  The vows say for better or worse for a reason.  Sometimes we get sick.  And each of us know we will not make it out alive in this world.

Each person is flawed.  A marriage exposes those flaws you possess to your fellow partner.  And somehow you need to work out your differences.  Forgiveness is the glue that makes it all work.  If you don’t forgive your mate at the end of the day, bitterness sets in.

We need a clean slate at the beginning of each day.  Learning to love one unconditionally frees the other.  A marriage forces you to learn how to love properly another human being.  And tests us like nothing else.

Sure, God created Eve for Adam was alone but nevertheless they both were very flawed when they came out of the Garden.  Both of them now faced sin (and their very flawed nature).  Marriage forces you to love in a way no other institution does.

Insisting your relationship be fifty fifty creates problems.  First of all the give and take in a relationship is seldom equal.  Consider it like a pendulum:  sometime one gives more and sometimes it is the other.

And sometimes it is just one sided.  Often due to bad health.  The commitment you made said for better or worse or in sickness or health.

Of course when the giving is always one sided problems arise.  I am convinced that God created woman just to teach man how to love.  There is always a flow back and forth.

When you insist it be tit for tat it is not love.  Each person gives what they can.  And sometimes we do not appreciate one another.  That is when most problems come about.  And then one brings out the score sheet.

Relationships are always in a state of flux.  Insisting it be fifty fifty all the time does not recognize this reality and creates major problems–resentment by one party being one.

I am convinced the only reason marriage exists is to teach us how to love better.  Each person is sinful (and very imperfect).  And selfish.  Living with another forces us to examine our own foibles.

Some marriages are a better fit than another.  It does not matter.  At some point, there is going to be conflict.  And how successfully you work it out determines the success of your marriage.

Each person is selfish and conflict draws this out.  The vows say for better or worse, in sickness or health.  Commitment is always the key.  Do you ride out the rough moments?  Every marriage will have difficult times.

Your partner sees all your sides given enough time.  The good points of yours as well as your bad side.  Nothing is hidden.

Only love can transcend them.  That is why I say the institution of marriage was created for only one reason–to teach us how to love better.

Your rough points given enough time in a marriage becomes smoothed over.  Love is always the key.  And commitment makes it work.

Life is never fair.  Nor is giving.  The pendulum swings in a marriage, sometimes, back and forth.  One person gives more of his/herself and then the other.  A vow was made during the marriage ceremonies:  the words “for better or worse” are there for a reason:  bad times will come to a marriage.  There will be illness, lost jobs, money problems and often conflict, which will need to be resolved.  Sometimes an illness will result in one partner taking care of the other, sometimes permanently (the marriage vow “till death do us part” is there for a reason).  The giving then may become totally unbalanced.  Insisting the giving be always 50/50 puts a strain on the marriage and is really unrealistic.  Really all a partner can do is love the other, not being concerned how equal the give and take is.  Insisting or complaining you are giving more consistently always puts a strain on the marriage.  We are commanded in our vows to love the other in sickness or health (or in any, every situation) (my words).  Each partner only gives what he/she can.  Insisting marriage be always 50/50 is always wrong.