Siggy's Blurbs: Siggy's Edge of Country …

Every marriage is flawed and it does me no good to point out my wife’s flaws to her.  I just forgive her and go on from there.  We are all imperfect (and sin).

There is no way to get around that.  I have to admit I balked at the statement I read in a book where it says it does no good to criticize anyone:  it just lessens our ability to love that person.

I know I often criticize my partner even if it is only self talk.  Somehow I need to forgive her for not matching up every day.  I certainly don’t.  So why should I expect her to not make any mistakes?  I err every day.

Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath is good advice from the Bible.  Give each other a clean slate and forgive each other at the end of each day.

Bitterness can form an almost impenetrable wedge between you and your mate.  So recognize that both of you are flawed and forgive each other at the end of the day.  Every marriage is flawed.

Tags: ability to love, Bible, bitterness, criticize, don't let the sun go down on your wrath, end of the day, err, every marriage is flawed, forgive, forgive each other, give a clean slate, God, impenetrable wedge, love, marriage, mistakes, my wife, self talk, we all sin, we are all flawed, we are imperfect, your mate
Posted in balance, God, knowledge&learning, life, love, marriage, relationships, time, wisdom | 2 Comments »

Your growth is stunted when you can not tolerate even the slightest degree of criticism.  You feel you must be perfect in order to be loved.  And everyone is flawed.

Having to feel you must be a “nice” person all the time is not a good thing.  It prevents you from being real.  Being genuine is knowing you can make mistakes and those around you will still love you.

When you can not tolerate even the slightest degree of criticism, others have to walk delicately around you.  Others have a harder time being genuine around you.

There really is nothing wrong with being “nice” but the question is at what price?  If it is all the time, something is wrong.

You become afraid of others seeing how you really are.  You have to let down your shields at least with some people.  When you truly feel loved, this become easier.

When you can not tolerate any one being critical the slightest degree, you are handicapped at work, at home and in your significant relationships.  In every area.

It is a long uphill journey to correct the damage usually caused during childhood.  And a lot of people make it back successfully and learn to love and be loved.  There is always hope.

Tags: "nice" person, being genuine, being real, childhood, damage during childhood, everyone is flawed, feel loved, handicapped, let down your shields, love and be loved, make it back, mistakes, must be perfect to be loved, relationships, stunted growth, there is always hope, tolerate criticism, walk delicately
Posted in balance, children, knowledge&learning, life, love, mental health, relationships, time, wisdom | No Comments »

It seems obvious but not to some:  you are flawed.  It is important to know that.  People who think they are perfectly fine create havoc around them; for they are not aware how they “mess” up.  And the people who they impact in the process.

The better you are aware of your proclivities, the less this happens.  Each person is prejudiced.  The word comes from pre judge.  The only question is to what extent.  Each person has leanings in one direction.  The better you are aware how you actually think and feel about certain things, the less you become prejudiced.

Words are always one sided.  There is always another side to the story.  Unfortunately sometimes you do not have the chance to rectify the situation.  Sometimes the damage has been done with words expressing one side of a situation.

Civility has a purpose.  Your rough edges get smoothed out.  Manners seem to (???) gone out the window.  Parents are not teaching manners.  They ought to.  Pleases and thank yous are always important.  Telling someone you have messed up, blew this situation is always helpful.

When Jesus was asked how many times should you forgive a person he said, Seventy times seven.  The fact is you are flawed and so is your fellow man.  When he/she makes a mistake we are commanded to forgive that person.

That commandment produces compassion in others.  Yes, each of us remind us of that fact it is easier to forgive others of their transgressions.  We all fall short of the mark.  And there is no getting around that.  So next time some one makes a mistake let it go.  You will be happier.  And so will the person.

Tags: another side to the story, Bible, civility, commandment, compassion, forgive, God, Jesus, manners, mess up, mistakes, perfect, predudiced means "pre judge", transgression, we all fall short, we are all flawed
Posted in balance, God, relationships, wisdom | 2 Comments »