I am going to vanquish my winter blues. It is too much self–indulgence. My pets love me (and my wife). And that is enough. My favorite dog, Tilla, ‘adores’ me, in the words of my daughter. I did nothing to deserve all that. And that is an incomplete list of the seven cats and two dogs who each love me in their own way. My pets do not care what I do or am. And my wife does not care about the degree I do not have, or job for that matter.

My birthday is coming up (and I am just depressed). I can not tell you exactly why although I can guess. Part of that is grief. Most of my life is over. I can’t go back. Wishing is futile. Somehow I need to settle things. My relationship with my daughter is fractured. I don’t know how to repair it. Lectures and judgements don’t do it. I am aware of the ticking time. I am running out of time. I guess, everyone wants to leave a legacy. I am working at getting my first book of poetry out but it is a long and uncertain process. My wife is the only one who really cares about that. She is my editor and a good one. Things really don’t matter. I really don’t know how much time I have left. For that matter, no one knows for sure. I know that somehow I need to make peace with the people who matter to me. I don’t know how. I am just depressed. That is all I know.

Being a father is not a right. It is a privilege. Sunday was Father’s Day. My son called me to wish me “Happy Father’s Day.” I did not hear from my daughter: she had hung up on me several weeks ago and cursed me out. I had written her a letter and she reacted violently to my words. Either we have a relationship based on truth or we have no relationship. It is her choice not to talk to me. I am not her friend but her Dad. And I will continue to speak the truth whether or not she likes it.

Lynelle and I celebrated Father’s Day by taking the Millersburg ferry across the Susquehanna River and eating at a great restaurant that was walking distance. Millersburg is a great quaint town. I took many pictures with my new digital camera of the river and of the town. I could not think of a better way to spend Father’s Day.

I was admonished by my wife to listen better.  She overheard my conversation with my daughter.  Her suggestion was to stop asking her direct questions and ask her opened (???) ended questions so she could really tell me how she is doing.  No one really likes to be given a barrage of questions.  It is something I have to work on–my listening skills.

Nicknames For My Dogs

Author: siggy

I have several nicknames for my dogs.  My daughter says you can’t change the name of you pet once you give one for your dog.  I beg to differ.

Pax my 90 pound Rottweiler mix is now Big Woof or Woof for short.  He is the most vocal of our four dogs.  And he is beginning to respond to the last name.

Coco is now called Wiggles for obvious reason when she sees you she wiggles all over the place when she sees you (???).

The other pup Tilla originally Atilla The Hun, now shortened to an affectionate Tilla, now has been called at various times Junior Woof or The Olympian or Small Woof.

The last other dog we have is named Sweetie and her name describes her to a tee so she will not get any other name.  It fits her perfectly.

An Unexpected Pleasure

Author: siggy

I had an unexpected pleasure.  My daughter came over for New Years Eve and spent the night.  Her plans had fallen through and I suggested she come over and spend New Years with my wife and me.

We had fun.  And more than enough food.  The table was full of goodies from shrimp to cold cuts and a vegetable tray and that was only a partial list.

In fact, we still had plenty of food for the next day and still had some food left over.

We watched a Marx Brothers’ film, “A Night at The Opera”.  I laughed my head off at many of the scenes particularly the one liners of Groucho.  His comments were so silly and absurd that I roared.

My wife did not think the film was that funny but my daughter also laughed.  I do not think she ever saw the film before.  It was of course released before her time (and mine).

My wife really enjoyed the scenes of one of the brothers playing piano and of course the obligatory scene of Chico playing harp.  They must have been quite a musical family.  It was harmless slapstick.  I had not seen the movie in a long time.

My New Year I spent with my wife and daughter was quite pleasant.  We of course watched the New Year’s show on TV and the apple go down on the stroke of midnight at Times Square.  Finally I went to sleep 1:30AM.

Thank God For My Pets

Author: siggy

Thank God for my pets.  Somehow I believe it is no accident my second wife also loves animals.  I never had pets growing up.  I love all of my pets.  All eight cats and all four dogs.  It is a menagerie.  And it is true I can’t go on vacation so easily but that is a small price to pay.

There is Tilla one of the pups we kept of our golden retriever (we kept two) who is a paradox extremely aggressive but timid at the same time.  For example, if you throw four scraps to our four dogs, he usually will get three if you don’t stop him.

He actually let my daughter pet him the last time she was over (that was a first).  He still runs in the other direction when my son approaches him.  And he is good with pets.

Coco is the other pup of Sweetie and extremely affectionate although she can be pretty insistent when she wants to go out.  She will sit at our feet front legs crossed sometimes–a real lady.  She gets along with everyone.

My eight cats are all different (the one unfixed female, now fixed) had two litters–one and three.  Pumpkin the only surviving cat from the first litter is one quiet, laid back cat who seems to get along with all the other seven.

The other three from the second litter of Jasmine’s are Cheyenne, China, and other whose name temporarily escapes me.  Both Cheyenne and China are long haired.  The mother is shorted (???) haired, small and dainty but able to take well care of herself.

Cheyenne is one beautiful although somewhat wild cat.  He usually does not let me pet him.  If I get too close, he gives me the eye as if to ask me “how dare you approach me?”

China is one exotically black and white colored cat who is one cool character.  He is extremely laid back and nothing seems to faze him.  I always have trouble remembering the sexes of our cats.

Cool Hand Luke a black female cat I brought into this marriage who hangs out in our bedroom and is appropriately named.  I have another completely black cat “Slinky”.

It is hard to tell the two apart although if you pet them you can tell the difference immediately.  “Slinky” is somewhat timid and extremely affectionate.

Tiger is the third cat from the second litter of Jasmine also appropriately named who sorts (???) blends in with every one.

Buttons is the other tiger looking cat who decided to adopt our family.  He showed up at our doorsteps and my wife started feeding him and when he got his shots, she let him come in.

He knew a good thing when he came in:  he did not go out for months again.  He is the newest member of our menagerie.  He does, at times, terrorize the other cats.

He also terrorized the vet and her staff during his exam:  It took them ten minutes to catch him in the exam room when he squirmed out of the grasp of the vet and three people were chasing him around the room (the vet called for backup).

He scratched the hell out of the vet in the process.  He is still a (???) somewhat wild although he has calmed somewhat after he got fixed.  That pretty much takes care of our cats.

Pax, the father of the pups, is the only pet of ours not mentioned by name.  He is the biggest and oldest dog close to an hundred pounds, an Rottweiler mix.

He suffered from bad ear infections and only at the vet where they put a muzzle on him would he allow anyone to go near to clean them.  It took me awhile before I lost my fear of him.  The veterinary helper called him a “baby.”  He is one dog I never want to get out he is one scary looking dog.

There is also Sweetie our golden retriever who is aptly named.  She will stand there forever letting you pet her.  She is one happy-go-lucky dog who always likes to have something in her mouth.  She was traumatized by her original owner who would lock her up for hours.  That is how we got her and that is the last of our menagerie.

My daughter worked the last eight days.  She is going to spend time with me today.  Father’s Day for her had to be postponed two days.  That is the most precious thing she has–her time.  She does not have much money but she has time.  And no price can be put on that.  Time is invaluable.  Especially when that is all you have.  So squander it on the people you care about.  It is a gift.  You never know for sure when it will run out.

bballMy twenty year old daughter observed, “You are not too old for you can still play basketball.”  Basketball is a game I have loved all my life.  There still is something esthetically pleasing to me about being able to shoot a basketball through the hoop.  If I can do it without touching the rim, it is even better.

I am sixty-one and not foolhardy enough to play a running game with the youth.  I am afraid to play with the abandon I used to in my youth.  I still find my daughter’s observation interesting.

I have loved basketball as far back as I can remember.  I was only a mediocre player but still loved playing.  I made up for my lack of talent with tenaciousness on the court.  I was not afraid of playing against anyone, any size.  Those days are over but I still enjoy shooting basketballs and see no reason to stop.

I can still use the sport to get back my wind and do that by shooting from different corners of the court and increasing the tempo gradually.  All I need is a basketball and some warmer weather.  I had forgotten how much I still love the game.  My daughter reminded me of that.  God bless her for that.