I Still Watch My Plants

Author: siggy

I still watch my plants.  I am still amazed by them.  Like they are run by some invisible clock, they grow or get bigger.  And I keep a close eye on them when they do this.  Even when they remain dormant, I keep an eye on them.  And rejoice when they start growing.  I am not alone in this pursuit.  A lot of people have house plants.  The proper light and sufficient water is usually all the care they need.  If only our needs were so simple.  It is others who watch our growth.  We can’t see it so easily.  Plants are easier to detect whether they are getting proper nourishment.  Although for both patience is needed and time is a factor.

Life is full of the tedious but get past it.  Get past the mundane and other worlds you barely imagined will appear.  It is always a waiting game.  A game that entails patience.  Door after door will open but first you need to open them–one by one.  Do not be afraid.  Each new day is a challenge and each day is an eternity waiting to be opened and plucked by you.  The universe is always there just beyond so work through the mundane.  It is always a waiting game.  Watch for your opportunities.  And be patient.  Another universe is always in front of you.  Patience is always the key.  Pounce on the opportunities presented to you.  Reality is like an onion to be peeled away layer by layer.  And there is always another layer even when you believe you have peeled and exposed the last, final one.  Never give up.  And always take care of yourself.  There are no end of worlds to explore but first you have to extend yourself, go beyond the ordinary, go further until there is no more to be seen, felt.  And another door will open.  And another.  The doors are endless but you have to get beyond the ordinary, the usual, the bland.  Only then will you be surprised.

I woke up in the middle of the night and Tilla one of my pups was asleep right next to me again.  I never thought another dog would come along who I would love as deeply as Daisy, now gone over three years.

Daisy was the first dog I raised from a pup.  She was one stubborn dog.  I finally decided to train her when I broke the front door window for the third time.  She would go berserk whenever I was about to leave the house.  She scared me and I slammed the door again breaking the glass.

It took infinite patience to train her to stop barking uncontrollably every time I was about to leave the house.  I would clamp my hands over her snout when she barked.  If she stopped, I praised her.  Otherwise I said nothing.

I repeated this technique umpteen times.  I knew I had succeeded when all I had to do when she barked was “shush” her and she would stop immediately.

It also took a long time to train her to sleep in the corner of the bed.  She would want to sleep too closely to me.  I must have pushed her away from me dozens of times in bed before she started sleeping at my feet.

My wife was always amazed that now she would automatically sleep at my feet at the furthest reaches of the bed.

When I was in the house her eyes never left me.  She was my dog.  She finally died and I missed her terribly.  And I thought that there would never be a another dog like her.

Well, Tilla came along.  We were down to one dog and someone gave us a young female golden retriever.  And you know the rest of the story:  she got pregnant before we could fix her.  And Tilla was one of her puppies.

Tilla as opposed to Daisy wanted to please.  We had our own set of problems with him.  Tilla was the only dog athletic enough to  jump the fence we had erected and finally at great expense we had it built higher.  He also had a bad habit of pooping in the dining room every night.

He is the only dog of ours who prompted a visit from the local dog warden when a neighbor complained about one of his escapades.

He was a scoundrel and was the most aggressive of our four dogs yet paradoxically was timid when it came to other humans except us.  He will be three next July.

Tilla did certain things to endear him to me.  He loved getting belly rubs and would turn over on a dime for that privilege.  Whenever he was waiting for me to let him out he would twirl rapidly in almost perfect circles.  He was the only dog to do that of our four.

I started giving him special walks because for a while he was the only dog we could not let loose in the yard.  He can’t replace Daisy but he has come close.  And he came when I least expected it.  He has captured my heart.

Everyone Has A Story

Author: siggy

Everyone has a story.  You just have to stop and listen and observe.  Every one tells their story differently.  All the drama is there.  You often find out their tales in bits and pieces.  Very seldom will theirs completely unravel.

Most of the time you gets little pieces of theirs.  In little chunks.  Maybe ten, fifteen seconds at a time.  They do not have to know you.  It is hard not to reveal anything of yourself.

Your dress, manner and conversation speaks volumes.  You just have to listen.  Some people reveal triumph, others tragedy.  Others failure.  All you have to do is keep your eyes and ears open.

Others peoples’ story are always unraveling in front of you.  You have to take the time to listen.  That is all it takes.  A little patience and time.

Depression can be a result of one major event but often it is an accumulation of a series of unresolved small matters.  Tackle each matter you have some control of, step by step, and usually your depression will lift.  It might take awhile, hours, days and sometimes a few weeks.

Somehow you need to examine your life and see what is on the surface, see what is bothering you.  It is often an accumulation of many small things.  Each small matter that you can exert some or more control of the sooner your depression will lift.

In this state it is usually a good idea to baby yourself a bit.  Start doing things that usually give you pleasure.  In the beginning it may be hard to remember the things you did in the past that always gave you pleasure but start somehow.

Just be patient, your depression will probably lift given enough time.  Just start.  Obtain solace from the fact depressions usually are temporary:  they will lift but you have to exert the power or control in your life you can.  It just takes time and effort.

And remember in the beginning, it will take greater effort:  an object at rest to get going will take greater energy and once you get moving it will take less and less extra energy to keep going.  So be patient in the beginning with your inertia (your state of depression).  It will get easier and easier as your depression eases but you have to make a greater effort in the beginning.

And by no means am I am saying to forgo professional help if you need it.  It may mean being put on an anti-depressant to buy time while you learn better coping mechanisms.  There is never shame in seeking the help of a doctor or counseling or both if you can not come out of your depression by yourself.  You do not have to do it alone.