Siggy's Blurbs: Siggy's Edge of Country …

The temperature is all relative:  today it is forty-seven degrees.  Cool for a late April date.  Yet if we had the same temperature in December or January, it would have been considered a warm day.  It is all a matter of perspective (and our expectations).  The best thing is just to enjoy the weather no matter what it is and make the best of it.  You have no control of the weather.  You just adjust.  There is no other way.

Tags: April, cool weather, December, January, our expectations, perspective, spring, temperature, the weather, winter
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A sense of humor is everything.  Others often exaggerate the severity of their problems.  Laughing at yourself defuses your seriousness.  You know your marriage is in trouble when you stop laughing at one another permanently.  In every marriage this happens occasionally but as long as you still can make each other laugh it lightens your load.  It is so easy to think the weight of the world is on your shoulders.  The best comedians make you laugh at things that are painful.  Humor gives you a better perspective of your situation.  It is too easy to magnify our importance.  It cuts right through that.

Tags: comedians, humor, laugh at yourself, laughter, lighten your load, marriage, perspective, sense of humor, seriousness, weight of the world, your problems
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The isolation you impose on yourself is bad because the problems you face become inflated.  When you break your silence and share your problems with trusted friends, you gain more of a proper perspective of your problems.

When you go beyond the borders of your house and mix with others, you usually find out others are also dealing with difficulties sometimes even worse than yours.

My favorite Norman Vincent Peal anecdote is when he was once walking with a acquaintance and this person ranted and railed about all the difficulties he was undergoing.

Norman interrupted the person in the middle of his conversation and asked him, “Do you want to know where you can go where you will no longer have problems?”  And the person exhorted him to tell him that immediately and Norman simply pointed to the ground.

Sometimes we forget difficulties are just normal state of affairs and we need someone to remind us of that fact.  Isolating yourself prevents you, often, from finding this elementary fact.

When you connect with someone and suddenly during the course of the conversation you find this out there is often a sigh of relief from you.

Life is full of problems and worries and concerns and it is important to find out yours are really not that unique and all are part and parcel of being alive.

Tags: being alive, break the silence, concerns, connect with someone, death, difficulties, difficulties are normal, do not isolate yourself, get out of the house, God, isolation is bad, life, life full of problems, Norman Vincent Peale, perspective, problems, problems inflated, share your problems, sigh of relief, trusted friends, worries
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You should cleave to your mate, which means not just sexually but every which way.  There could be too much togetherness.  There always has to be some space between both of you.  This separateness expands and contracts.  That is known as communication.

Each partner needs a sense of perspective about themselves and the other.  An outside friend always helps.  Someone you feel safe with and at the same time does not threaten your relationship.  Particularly in relationships you have with the opposite sex you have to be very careful.  Engage in communication under very safe conditions that do not unnecessarily threaten your partner.

And your situation becomes very difficult when every relationship threatens your partner.  It is a balancing act.  You always need to maintain your integrity.  Loyalty to the higher standard (truth, God, and if you want to call it the higher power) is always essential.

You want to remain loyal to your mate but at the same time it is important to keep your sense of perspective.  The only way that can be done is by having outside friends.  Those relationships also prevent you from becoming stale to your partner.  It is a paradox:  you must cleave to your mate but at the same time keep some distance (or proper perspective about each other).  Both partners are enriched by outside friends.

And each time your contact ends with your friend you have something more to share with your partner–maybe a slightly different take on something.  It is, always, as I said a balancing act.  You are always enriched by maintaining your perspective about each other.  The last thing you want to do is have your relationship to become inbred (and stale).  Then your view of each other becomes magnified (instead of realistic).

Tags: against the whole world, balance, cleave to your mate, communication, friends, God, integrity, loyalty, marriage, perspective, relationships, sense of perspective, space between both of you, too much togetherness, truth
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