Siggy’s Blurbs

‘The poor man thinks money will buy his happiness, the rich man knows it won’t.’  The first time I heard that said it was my pastor (and friend) who told me that.  I am sure it was not his original words.  It is true when you are struggling to pay your bills it is a common illusion.  And not being able to put food on your table is certainly anxiety provoking.  Money can’t replace your sense of purpose.  It is true sometimes your job is a good fit.

You always wonder how it would be not to worry about money.  King Solomon was the richest man in the world, had it all, lacked for nothing and all he could say in the book he wrote was, ‘Vanity, everything is vanity.’  Riches can not buy peace of mind.  If you read Ecclesiastes, the book he is credited with writing in the Bible, and do not read the ending; you miss the whole point.  In it he said the beginning of wisdom is the fear of the Lord.  Every person needs a relationship with the Almighty.  It all come down to that.  Money never satisfies.  Ask the billionaire who can buy anything whether money can buy him happiness.  I think you know the answer.

Tags: "vanity everything is vanity", Almighty, anxiety, Bible, billionaire, buy happiness, Ecclsiastes, fear of the Lord, God, King Solomon, money, pastor, pay your bills, peace of mind, poor man, put food on the table, rich man, riches, sense of purpose, wisdom
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My wife did not want to put a paper clip on the documents she spent six hours preparing.  We had a short conversation regarding that and I finally let it go.  It seemed such a small thing.  And I did not understand but I acquiesced.  It was her business.  Later on she revealed the reason.  Sometimes we don’t want to do a certain thing.  And it is really a small matter.  And sometimes it is not.  You just have to let it go.  And not force the issue.

Tags: documents, just have to let it go, marriage, my wife, paper clip, relationships, wisdom
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It was one small thing:  my dirty socks were sometimes inside out but finally she started complaining about it for she did the laundry and had to make them right side out.  Finally I made sure the dirty socks I placed on the dryer were right side in.

It was a small thing but marriage is composed of many small acts.  Things you work out between you.  And every marriage is different.  It was important to her that I not place my dirty socks inside out on the dryer so I did it.  Little things matter.

Tags: balance, clothes dryer, dirty socks, laundry, little things matter, love, many small acts, marriage, relationships, socks inside out, washing machine, wisdom, work things out between you
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Often your worst fears don’t materialize.  And sometimes you have to be aware you are more vulnerable when you are fatigued and feeling overwhelmed.  You have to be kinder to yourself.  And realize your feelings at these moments can be a deceiver.  There is nothing like a solid night sleep to evaporate your worst fears that can run rampant in these moments.

You just have to be aware when your feelings are a more reliable indicator how you truly are doing.  And feelings do come and go and there are many shades of them very seldom do they run to the extremes–from despair to great joy and often you are somewhere in between and that is okay.

The mountain peaks only come once in awhile so enjoy the simple pleasures that come along and treat yourself not too harshly when you err.  We all do.  And forgive those who do also.  You do not expect yourself to be perfect so extend that same privilege to those around you.  Your life will run smoother.  Be happy with what you’ve got.  You only get one time around.

Tags: be happy with what you've got, be kind to yourself, despair, do not expect perfection, emotions, enjoy simple pleasures, evaporate fears, fatigue, fear, feelings can be a deceiver, feelings come and go, forgive, great joy, life, only get one time around, overwhelmed, solid night's sleep, when you err, wisdom, your feelings, your life, your worst fears
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Sometimes you just have to let things go.  It does not matter if you or your mate was right.  You have to give your mate a clean slate every day.  ‘Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath’–lines from the New Testament.

The devil uses forgiveness to pit one mate against the other.  And we are all imperfect.  And each day each person make mistakes so it is important to let them go and start the day afresh.

There is wisdom in those lines from the bible.  If you do not forgive the other for their failures, resentment builds and drives a wedge between you.

Forgiveness allows you to love your partner fully and with humility.  Each person knows in their heart that they are not perfect so why should you expect your partner to be otherwise?

Tags: Bible, clean slate every day, devil, don't let the sun go down on your wrath, drive a wedge between you, everyone makes mistakes, failures, forgiveness, God, humility, know in your heart, let things go, love your partner, New Testament, no one is perfect, resentment, start each day afresh, we are all imperfect, who is right, wisdom, your mate
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The right word spoken to you can be like honey:  It soothes the throat right away.  Bless the people who have the wisdom to utter to you just the right words  at the right time.

I walked into his office flustered, stating “My wife is driving me crazy “!  And my doctor immediately retorted, “Isn’t that what all wives do?”  I felt like he gave me back my life.  I was not that unusual.

I have been dealing with depression after meeting with my nephrologist several weeks ago.  I mentioned that to the other doctor and he said, “That seems perfectly normal considering the life changes the other doctor was contemplating you undergoing.”

I felt better after his statement.  It did not take away my depression but at least I felt it was normal being depressed under those circumstances.  And I just had to work through it.

That is why it is so important not to isolate yourself.  When you talk to others outside the home you often find out other people are experiencing the same thing or what you are going through is perfectly normal.

You never find out those things out if you stay in your house and do not talk to others.  An apt word spoken just at the right time can soothe your fears which often run wild if kept to themselves.

Remember, ‘No man is an island’.  These words of John Donne have calmed many a person when they decided to stop isolating themselves.  It is amazing how many times the right advice can soothe yours fears that have run wild in the confines of your home.

We are really wired to be social “animals” and have much more in common with one another than we realize but we have to take a chance and reach out to others.  Then we find that out.  It is not necessary to do it alone.

Tags: a lot in common, apt word, calm, depression, doctor, don't do it alone, don't isolate yourself, fears run wild, John Donne, life changes, like honey, nephrologist, no man is an island, normal, reach out to others, right advice, social animals, soothe your fears, stay in your house, talk to others, the right word, wife, wisdom, work through it
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You must always face death with courage.  None of us knows, for sure, how much time we have on this earth.  Sometimes death can come suddenly and other times slowly.

You have two broad choices:  You can live your life with courage or you can live your life with fear.  Death is the fear of the unknown.

I choose courage.  And the wisdom that can accompany it.  We are all going to die one day.  That is a fact.  But people act as if death does not exist.

It can only make your life that much sweeter.  Imagine if we knew were were going to live for eternity.  How awful that would be.

Face each day that God has given you with gratitude.  Then it no longer matters how much time you are here on this earth.  Face each day with courage and wisdom.  Death then has no power.

Tags: courage, death, death has no power, eternity, face death, fear, fear of the unknown, God, gratitude, life, live with courage, live with fear, time on earth, unknown, we all die, wisdom
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I had a major struggle with a bipolar disorder (then called manic-depression).  And there was a seven year period where I was out of control (until I was stabilized on lithium in 1972).  It took even years until I was properly diagnosed.  I went through hell and pain.

I never tortured myself with the question, “Why?”  There are no answers to that.  Life is not fair.  Every one has varying success in overcoming their hurdles.

But if you start asking the question, “Why or Why me”, there will only be silence.  God allowed the Devil to take away everything from Job (in the Old Testament) including his family, his possessions.

Eventually the Devil gave up on him.  God restored Job and his health.  I am not saying that if you are ill God will do the same.  But if you look at yourself and rail at God for your station in life, it will only make your life harder.  And make those around you miserable.

Accept the things you have no control of, change the things you can and have the wisdom to know the difference (really a paraphrase of the serenity prayer).  Stop asking yourself the question why and just move on with your life.

Tags: acceptance, bipolar, change what you can, devil, don't ask why, family, God, God restores, health, Job, lithium, manic-depression, Old Testament, possessions, serenity prayer, went through hell, wisdom
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Death is really valuable.  The fact that our lives are finite makes our lives that much sweeter.  What if you knew you were going to live forever; would there be any urgency to your life?  Doesn’t it make a difference knowing some day we are going to die?  And not only that.  We have no idea when.

Life becomes that much more valuable knowing it is finite.  When we are young there is the illusion we are going to live forever.  It is only an illusion, sometimes shattered when a friend close to us meets an untimely death.

I never forgot Anna Quinlan’s (the well known writer) comments.  She was in college and temporarily left to take care of her mother who was dying.  Then she returned to college with a different perspective, a keener appreciation of life.  She looked at her fellow students and considered their concerns now trivial.  Life had become very precious to her.  Her Mom died.  And the last few months she spent taking care of her illustrated to her how fragile and tenuous life really was.  She had a new found appreciation of how precious life really was.

One can not live with the notion he or she may go at any moment.  Everything is by grace.  And the awareness of the specter of death that awaits every one makes life that much sweeter  and always gives you a greater appreciation of the simple things every one takes for granted.  From dust you come and from dust you shall return.  Those words in the bible are so true.  Our society today views death as a curse.  It is really a gift so appreciate the time the Lord has given to you.  You only have one life so enjoy it and make the best of it.

Tags: Anna Quinlan, Bible, death, dust-to-dust, dying, God, life, living, Lord, one life, wisdom
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I do not have to know everything.  Of course, no one can.  There are few Renaissance people any more.  Yet it is so easy to feel shame if you can not do  simple things and envy the knowledge others possess.  It is so hard to know what you know and know what you do not.  This knowledge is the beginning of wisdom.  Ignorance is bliss.  You can relax in the fact this world is interdependent.  We all need one another.

Money can provide the illusion this is not so.  It is truly an illusion.  All you have to do is think of all the services provided for you.  Someone keeps the roads paved.  Someone is raising the crops that provide the food you buy in supermarkets.  The Army and the police assure your safety.  There are scientists,  engineers working on solutions to improve your life further.  There are hospitals, doctors, teachers, the list is endless of people out there providing for you and your children.  Are you beginning to get the point?  We are dependent on one another.

In fact the bad ecoconomic state we are in even more so forces us to rely on each other.  That is really a good thing.  One does not have to do it alone and can relax.  Still you have to do your part.  Nevertheless,  we are interdependent with one another.  We can rely on each other.  That is really  the way the world is designed.  In the words of John Donne,  ‘No man is an island.’  If we can hold on to that idea, the world becomes a much smaller place and we can relax further.  No one has to do it alone.  We are in this world together.  It is okay to ask for help when you need it and certainly it is okay to reach out to the needs of people around you.  All that can be very comforting.

Tags: balance, interdependence, knowledge, learning, relationships, wisdom
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