Siggy's Blurbs: Siggy's Edge of Country …

What I remember about Greystone (going back forty years) is the locked doors.  Each one led to another dismal ward.  Of course, I did not have any of the keys.  I had no freedom.  Everything was taken away from me.  I was told when to get up, when to eat and what medications I had to take.  In those days when you were in a manic state they always pumped you up with Thorazine, which was a real “downer”.  It felt like punishment.  It was not even my fault.  Almost all the drugs to treat bipolar disorder now did not exist then.  I remember very well having almost all my civil rights taken away from me.  There was not even a phone on the ward.  I needed special permission to go downstairs and make a call.  I was treated like a prisoner.  Those were some of the memories I had of my hospitalization.

Tags: 40 years ago, bipolar disorder, civil rights, dismal ward, Greystone, locked doors, manic state, manic-depression, medications, no freedom, no keys, no telephone, prisoner, psychiatric hospital, psychiatric institution, Thorazine
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I had a major struggle with a bipolar disorder (then called manic-depression).  And there was a seven year period where I was out of control (until I was stabilized on lithium in 1972).  It took even (???) years until I was properly diagnosed.  I went through hell and pain.

I never tortured myself with the question, “Why?”  There are no answers to that.  Life is not fair.  Every one has varying success in overcoming their hurdles.

But if you start asking the question, “Why or Why me”, there will only be silence.  God allowed the devil to take away everything from Job (in the Old Testament) including his family, his possessions.

Eventually the devil gave up on him.  God restored Job and his health.  I am not saying that if you are ill God will do the same.  But if you look at yourself and rail at God for your station in life, it will only make your life harder.  And make those around you miserable.

Accept the things you have no control of, change the things you can and have the wisdom to know the difference (really a paraphrase of the serenity prayer).  Stop asking yourself the question why and just move on with your life.

Tags: acceptance, Bible, bipolar, change what you can, devil, don't ask why, family, God, God restores, health, Job, life is not fair, lithium, manic-depression, Old Testament, possessions, serenity prayer, went through hell, wisdom, your life
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