The waxed begonias–both beds–and the two Gerbera Daisies are doing fine.  In fact in the last week I discovered the bright red Gerbera Daisy has a second flower this one facing the fence and the orange one has another bud coming up.  It is only the beginning of Fall so let us see how long these flowers flourish.  When it turns colder I will keep my eyes open for signs of the primrose.  There is, I believe, six different colored primrose.  I love watching my yard for different signs of life, particularly, the flowers.  Some are wild, some aren’t.

It is always better in the light.  I need to get out, rub shoulders with others–even if it is only briefly.  Sleep is coming from the darkness.  It is an abyss.  You have no control of your dreams.  It is almost like death.  My surroundings are too familiar.  Outside it is light (and sometimes hope).  Depression is too easy.  It is always better in the light.

Tilla (one of my dogs) will feel no pain (or aches) this night.  I had put some peanut butter and a pain pill to give to Pax (another dog of ours).  Tilla grabbed it.  I immediately pulled the slice of bread out of his mouth.  Too late.  The pill was gone.  I was mad. Tilla will feel no pain tonight.  I prepared another slice of bread with peanut butter with another pain pill and made sure Tilla was far away when I gave Pax his nightly meds.

I injured my “monster” cactus, which was hanging over four feet from a tree outside.  I was not paying attention and banged into it and tore partially one of the four foot tentacles.  I duct taped the ripped tentacle together and then I hung it off the ground by some wire to release some of the pressure on it.  The tentacle of the cactus started to tear at the impact point of the wire so I put it in a sling using a discarded sock so the rip might not continue.  I felt bad about it and hope the tentacle closes up in time.

The goldfinch stopped coming in flocks.  In the last week.  Sometimes between the finch feeder and sunflower feeder there could be seen at one time five or six or more goldfinch.  In the last week they stopped coming in throes.  Now I am lucky if I see more than one or two at one time.  I have no explanation for this.  I did nothing different.  I am not sure if goldfinch migrate.  That would be a possible explanation.  I have to ask someone about this.  I am just curious about that.

I sometimes get a really enthusiastic greeting from Tilly Willy, my favorite dog.  I will be in my bedroom and he will jump on my bed to get a hug from me, which I always do.  I never know when he is going to do that.  He is unpredictable.  He certainly knows how to make me feel wanted and is openly affectionate.  He is my favorite dog.  He and I have a special relationship.  My first dog I raised from a pup died awhile ago and I never thought another one like her would come along.  Daisy was one stubborn dog but when I was in the same room she never took his eyes off of me.  Tilly Willy aims to please.  He gets special treatment from me.

Again, my three black animals joined me in my bedroom.  First, “Cool Hand Luke” my black cat who I have had since I been married to my other was one animal–over ten years–and the other two dogs I consider my “pups” although now both are full grown.  We had the two dogs since the beginning.  They were born in my house.  The long haired one-Coco-usually can be found lying on my side of my bed and the other dog is “Tilly Willy” who usually joins me at the foot of my bed after I have retired for the night.  I never know what he is going to do next.  A few nights again he jumped on my bed and I fell asleep with him lying next to me.  I have to say these two dogs are not small dogs:  they probably weigh over eighty pounds each.  It is comforting to me to have them join me at night.

The last day of summer the “Monster” cactus bloomed.  I was thrilled about this.  The pink flower was five inches in diameter.  It has one more bloom to go.  When we bought it home months ago, it was blooming all over it.  I never had a cactus bloom on me.  It must have liked the sun it received in that spot.  Its tentacles hanging from a tree are several feet long.  It truly is unusual.  If I remember correctly, she bought it for my birthday (in April).  She was amazed by it, as I am by it now.

I may have to think as a fish.  I am not a very good fisherman and it occurred to me if I want to do better I may have to view the water I am fishing from the point of view of the fish.  Is the water warm, cold or whatever.  Does the particular fish I am going for going to like the bait I am dangling before it.  I am not very good at this.  Maybe, it really does not matter.  All I want to do is be outside.  At least, have an excuse.  I no longer eat the fish I caught.  I simply want to throw them back.  So maybe all this discussion is futile.  I don’t care enough what the fish thinks.

The little mouse I spotted a second time in my garage made me laugh.  I am the only one to have seen him.  Of course, he may be a she.  Anyway, for ten seconds he chased his tail in a frenzy completing quick small circles and then promptly disappeared.  It was only a very small segment of my day.  It was totally unexpected and made me laugh.  You have to be able to laugh at the small events that come your way.  After all, isn’t life composed of many small details and brief events?

I have been watching the “monster” cactus hanging outside from a tree and its four buds.  Two are almost open.  They should make it before it gets too cold for the plant and we have to bring it in for the season.  It really does not like the cold too much.  Two buds that are just emerging will probably not make it but the other two will.  I am absolutely thrilled we will have flowers from the plant.  When we bought the plants months ago it had multiple flowers.  They were gigantic several inches wide and tall.  These probably won’t be that big.  I think my wife bought the plant to spoof me.  Its tentacles hanging from the tree are several feet long.  I have never seen anything like it before.

It was in the fifties and when I stepped out I felt cold.  It is back to wearing more layers of clothing.  Soon I will discard my tee shirts and shorts for the rest of the year.  It is still officially Summer but it feels like Fall already.  I always wondered how it would feel not to live in a temperate climate.  Maybe if I didn’t, I would not appreciate spring and the warmer weather so much.