Siggy's Blurbs: Siggy's Edge of Country …

‘You add something to my life,’ she said recently.  It came out of the blue.  I wish she would say nice things more often.  Too many times she “jumps” on me for something I did not do or did incorrectly.  It is so easy to criticize a mate.  I am as guilty as her in this regard.

What if for everything I did wrong she said something positive towards me.  I could strive to do the same.  Gratitude is a two way street.  It is so easy to focus on the negative.  I have been as guilty as any one else.

Praise always has to be genuine to be effective.  Others wilt in the face of too much criticism.  And I need to work on this as much as my Other.

Tags: criticism, genuine, gratitude, mate, negative, positive, praise, say nice things
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Sometimes people bless you when you least expect them to.  I remember once working at a residential home and taking apart a vacuum cleaner for its passage way was clogged up and thinking nothing of it.

My boss noticed that and commented and praised me for doing that and said in passing another worker is not able to do things like that.

I realized at that point my ability to fix the vacuum cleaner was a gift.  Not everyone can do that.  Sometimes we are so quick to dismiss abilities we have because we know other people can do it better.  Her praise was a gift and blessed me.

Another time I was at my school and showed a teacher some poetry of mine and she rapidly read some of my work and then commented, “I can’t write like that.”  She had multiple degrees and I had none but she blessed me when she said that.

Most of the time people bless you when you least expect it.  We take our own gifts for granted and other people remind us, sometimes, they are really gifts and you have been blessed by them.  Every gift is by grace.  Never forget that.

Tags: abilities are gifts, bless you, blessed by our gifts, boss, college degree, gift is by grace, God, poetry, praise, praise is a gift, residential home, take gifts for granted, teacher, when you least expect it, writing
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One author stated that every time you criticize a person openly (or even in your self talk) you lessen your ability to love that person. Every time I read that or even think about that statement I balk.

We live in a society where criticism is openly stated. The only questions is how kindly it was done. Very rarely is praise openly given. More likely governments, leaders are openly torn apart.

Every move by our president, our leaders is examined and commented upon repeatedly often negatively. We have supposedly a free press yet at what expense?

Other governments, their population, are not allowed to express any comments even remotely critical of their leaders, government.

If you were to overhear the conversations of parents directed at their kids you would be flabbergasted how critical and demeaning their comments often are.

I far too often criticize my mate and do not listen properly. Listening is a form of love. It is all too easy to go on a tear on your mate.

So when I read those words that to criticize another lessens our ability to love that person I balked. I know I mentioned this but I will again: Phil Jackson (who has won nine NBA championships) did not turn around his career until he realized for every negative comment he made toward his players he had to make nine. (???)

Encouragement in our society does not occur often enough. There are two ways to look at it: one person can accent the positive things a person does or simply correct the mistakes another commits. It is far easier to tear down a person than build up that person.

I know how far I have to go before I properly love my wife (and my kids). Our society has a long way to go including me. Proper Encouragement (another form of love) can potentially revolutionize this world so think really hard before you criticize some one around you. I know I have to retool my thinking. Love is everything.

Tags: critical and demeaning comments, criticism, easier to tear down a person than build up, encouragement, God, listening is a form of love, love, love is everything, my kids, my wife, NBA, negative comments, Phil Jackson, praise, society
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