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I remember during my first serious relationship thinking every time I had a big fight it was the end of us.  She kept reassuring me it was not.  I now know couples have fights because they are trying to work things out.  Conflict is normal.  You just don’t want constant unresolved conflict for that is not healthy for the relationship.  It puts it on very fragile ground.  Fights are fueled by deep feelings and somehow you have to learn how to resolve differences.  It is the resolution of conflict that cements the relationship.  A fight means work needs to be done between the two of you.  It is a natural process.

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Conflict is good. It forces you to connect with your partner at a deeper level. You want to resolve your conflict, to seek peace with your partner.

In order to do that you have to reach deep within you, find the solution to resolve the impasse. This is all good. You must seek a creative solution to break the impasse.

In the process your roots are entangled with your partner, making your connection that much deeper. Conflict brings your deepest feelings to the surface.

After peace comes, you know your conflict resolution was genuine. Couples who do not argue are not facing their conflict head on but are superficially connecting with one another.

Anger indicates you have hit a nerve and you need to find a solution pleasing to both–often a compromise. Then a calm can come bringing peace to the couple. One needs to be kind in the process otherwise too many hurt feelings will hinder your resolution of your conflict.

Conflict can be a good thing. In the wake of a genuine solution, a couple’s relationship can become that much stronger. Conflict, in that case, is always beneficial.

Tags: anger, argue, be kind, compromise, conflict can be a good thing, conflict resolution, couples, hurt feelings, love, marriage, peace, relationships, seek peace, your deepest feelings
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