Siggy's Blurbs: Siggy's Edge of Country …

(1)  My wife whose support makes it all worthwhile

(2)  The extension of our fence so now all four dogs can run wild within it and we don’t have to worry about them getting out

(3)  The seventh Christmas we are spending together

(4)  The purchase of a “new” used vehicle

(5)  another year

(6)  my illness if you can call it that has given me a keener sense of the time bestowed to me

(7)  my two sisters who are always there when I need them

(8)  The four books Marilyn sent to me

(9)  all my friends

(10)  The safety of my trip to Boston during a difficult time:  I know angels were watching me during my ride to Boston and back.

(11)  I finally made it to “Walden Pond”

(12)  All my animals particularly my four dogs who never ask for anything and just love you unconditionally

(13)  For providing for all our needs

(14)  All the people who take care of us:  from Bob our mechanic to our dentist and all our doctors.  They just serve us.

(15)  My wife, the editor, lover and friend

(16)  John, you know who you are

(17)  The heat in our house

(18)  My web site and “Siggy’s Blurbs”

(19)  Sara’s support, you know who you are, also

(20)  My two, Emma and Saul

(21)  for everything I have forgotten to be grateful for

(22)  Pastor Pete and his flock

(23)  only “You” who without I can not do any thing

Tags: 2009, angels watching me, Bob our mechanic, books, Christmas, dogs, dogs love you unconditionally, editor lover and friend, Emma, fence, four dogs, friends, God, grateful, gratitude, heat in our house, illness, John, Marilyn, my animals, my friends, my two sisters, my web site, my wife, new used vehicle, our dentist, our doctors, Pastor Pete and his flock, people take care of us, pets, providing for all our needs, Sara's support, Saul, Siggy's Blurbs, those who serve, time bestowed to me, trip to Boston, Walden Pond, You who I can not do anything without
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I want to thank the people who are in my life.  I know most people will never read this and I will leave out people and I realize Thanksgiving has passed but it is never too late to do this.  All these people take the “extra step” and I do not want to take any of them for granted.

First the medical team

(1) Dr. Hume for your kindness and helpfulness

(2) Dr. Cornelius for your patience

(3) Dr. Blake for her thoroughness

(4) Dr. Mital for your ability to listen

Then,  P & R and Bob and his team who takes care of our cars and keeps them running smoothly, I thank you for your honesty and competence and for standing up to your work even when it costs you and most of all for always giving me the time of day when I have a question about my vehicle

For both of my sisters Fran and Marilyn who are always there when I need them

For Tony for your support:  you know who you are

For Sara, who I have known for over fifteen years and is one of the reasons I still write for her encouragement never abated

For the audience at the local coffeehouse who laughed at my material encouraging me to continue to find the humorous in everyday situations

For Elizabeth Yon wherever you are and the years you spent moderating our writing group

My two kids who years ago I thought I never would have but they came and have blessed me immeasurably

All the many people who God put in my life including those from my small church who have blessed me with their presence

To Sonya who welcomes everyone at the local post office and gives me one more reason why I want to stay in my small town and Perry county

And most of all for my wife who inspires me and still makes me laugh after all these years and came into my life when I was not looking, who thinks she is better than me at Scrabble (she did lose the first ten games she played against me).  As an editor she has no equal.  My website and blog would never have come into being if it was not for her (she is the webmaster).  I “pop” out my bed each morning because of her.  And she bakes a pretty “mean” apple pie.  She gives me a reason to cook.  And that is no small thing.  And after six years she still wants to sleep in our bed.  I call her “serendipity” although she can really be stubborn (for that matter so can I); nevertheless, I thank the Lord every day for her.  I did nothing to deserve her.

Tags: apple pie, audience, blessed, blog, car mechanic, cars, church, coffeehouse, competence, cooking, doctor, editor, encouragement, find the humor, friends, God, honesty, inspires me, makes me laugh, my kids, my wife, post office, Scrabble, serendipity, sisters, small town, stubborn, take for granted, take the extra step, thank people, thank the Lord every day, thank-you, thanksgiving, the Lord, those who serve, webmaster, website, writer, writers group, writing
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Your roots are not just the physical area you live in.  It is the memories you have accumulated in the past and continue to do so.

For over twenty years I visited Miami.  I no longer want to.  My parents lived there but now both are deceased and I have no ties there.  There is no longer any reason to go back.

I lived in Duncannon for fifteen years.  I still have friends there but it is no longer my home.  My wife and kids don’t live there any longer.  I may visit but it is no longer my home.

Our roots are the people who are the most important to us.  It is the people we reach out to every day (and who reach out to us).  It is the lives we are intertwined with.

Of course, the areas we have lived in the past we associate with certain memories.  Your roots are always invisible but real nevertheless.  And is always more than the particular area you live in.

Tags: deceased, Duncannon, friends, intertwined lives, memories, Miami, my home, my kids, my parents, my wife, no longer my home, no ties anymore, where you live, your roots
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All I want you to do is listen, not feel sorry for me.  The prognosis was not good.  My kidney function had declined and I might have to undergo dialysis within a year.

My depression further increased when I learned only a third of the people undergoing dialysis survive five years and there was, also, a greater chance of stroke and heart disease.

Suddenly I realized I might not make it even to sixty-five.  My mortality became real.  Everyone knows that they are going to die eventually but act as if death will never come and when it does others act surprised and think it is a terrible thing.

I wanted to talk openly about this latest development but I felt odd bringing it up with certain loved ones and friends.  Death has become a taboo.  It is not discussed openly in our society.

I did not want sympathy.  I did not want others to feel sorry for me.  Instinctively I knew who I could not discuss my situation with.  I felt odd with them.

With those people when they ask me how I am doing, I just say “fine.”  I really wanted someone to listen, to be able to share my fears–my fears of hopelessness, of being in pain and discomfiture, dependent on others, afraid of losing my mental facilities.

I just wanted to go out in grace and peace.  Death was knocking.  There are no certainties.  It just did not look good.  I will grab every bit of control I can in my situation.  I just did not want to do it alone.

Tags: death, death is taboo, death knocking, dependent, depression, dialysis, discomfiture, discuss death openly, don't feel sorry for me, don't want to do it alone, every bit of control, friends, go out in grace, God, hopelessness, kidney function, listen, loved ones, mental facilities, mortality, pain, peace, prognosis not good, share my fears, society, someone to listen, sympathy, talk openly about death
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Why do we care so much about things?!  You can not take your material possessions with you when your time comes.  It says in the Bible ‘from dust you come and to dust you shall return’.

I am as guilty as anyone of this.  My music, my writings and journals and books are far too important to me.  Yet when my appointed hour comes, I can no longer hang on to any of these things.

Why do we act as if we can take our possessions with us when we die?  We try up till the last moment to retain some control of our most valuable possessions.  We make wills.

The fact still remains we can’t take them with us.  Wouldn’t it make more sense to invest in the things that really have more lasting effects?  Wouldn’t it make more sense to invest time while you are on earth in relationships–your immediate family, your friends, your kids?

Once you are gone all people have are their memories of you, the love and care you have demonstrated toward them.  You can have far reaching effects if you have invested time and love in others while you were on this earth.  People you have loved have memories of you long after you are gone.

Far too many people do not invest time in others.  They spend their whole life in accumulating things.  No one remembers how hard you worked in your lifetime.  They remember the love you have demonstrated toward them.  So before it is too late, do something about it.  Examine your priorities.  You have one life.

Tags: accumulating things, appointed hour, Bible, books, can't take it with you, care, dust-to-dust, examine your priorities, family, friends, invest in relationships, invest time and love in others, journals, kids, lifetime, long after you are gone, love, love is remembered, make will, material possessions, memories, music, on this earth, people remember the love, writing, you have one life
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Love is everything.  Strip away everything from you–all your material wealth, your health.  That is all that remains–love.  And some people are so stingy with it.  You can not run out of love.

It comes from the Source–a bottomless pit known as the Almighty.  He never runs out of love to give.  If you continually tap the source, you will never run out of love.  There is not an finite amount.

Never give up a chance to love another.  This world is full of people who are starving for love, people who never had an ear to listen.

Never walk away when you could have given something valuable to another.  That is all any person remembers–how much they were loved by you.

It really does not matter how much money you made, or how many things you accumulated.  People always respond to genuineness–honesty and kindness.  That is all they remember from you.

You can never have too many friends or ever turn down a chance to make another friend.

That is all that remains when everything is stripped from you–love.  That is all people respond to and remember.  Love.  So be careless.  Scatter your love like Johnny Appleseed did his seeds all over the country.

Tags: friends, God, honesty, Johnny Appleseed, kindness, love, love is everything, never run out of love, starving for love, The Almighty
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I still never forgot the passage from Proverbs in the Bible, which states and this is a paraphrase:  it is better to have a meal with others where much love is displayed and the pickings are thin, than to have a feast where very little love is exhibited.  Of course, the passage stated this much more succinctly.

Everyone has been in a crowd and felt very lonely for he/she did not have one genuine connection with anyone.  Love matters.  It always does.  It dispels fear, worry.

How many people have moved to a strange, unfamiliar area because they knew one person.  One person is all it takes to dispel loneliness and give you the courage to venture out into foreign territory.

Our mate ought to be a helpmate, your best friend, your only lover.  Yet if she/he is the only one it places too much pressure on that person.  It is better to have a network set up of friends–others who also love you too.

The well which you draw from to love others is endless.  Love is infinite.  The more you can give the more you have.  And it comes back ten fold.  It is the only thing that matters.  When everything is stripped from you that is all that is left:  love.  It is the only thing that matters in life.

There are many very lonely millionaires out there who have discovered:  money can’t buy happiness.  The best part about it is love is free.  So give it away.  You will never be disappointed.

Tags: best friend, Bible, friends, give love away, God, helpmate, lonely in a crowd, lonely millionaires, love, love dispels fear and worry, love is infinite, love the only thing that matters, lover, mate, millionaire, money, money can't buy happiness, network of friends, one person, Proverbs
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Your true inheritance is not your things:  it is the people you have touched in your lifetime.  It is the people who you have influenced who are here after you are gone.  It is your children (if you have been blessed with them), your friends.  Every person you have ever impacted in your life.

It can only happen if you invest time in others, if you are genuine, reached out to those in need.  And there are neighbors always in need in some way.  You just have to pay attention.  That is your true inheritance.

It is not your house, your expensive sound system, your car, your books.  You can not take any possession with you.  In fact, there is nothing you can take with you after you are gone.

The people you have influenced affect others in an ever widening circle.  That is your true inheritance.

Tags: can not take possessions with you, children, friends, God, helping, invest time in others, neighbors, not your things, pay attention, people you have touch, reach out to those in need, your inheritance
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You should cleave to your mate, which means not just sexually but every which way.  There could be too much togetherness.  There always has to be some space between both of you.  This separateness expands and contracts.  That is known as communication.

Each partner needs a sense of perspective about themselves and the other.  An outside friend always helps.  Someone you feel safe with and at the same time does not threaten your relationship.  Particularly in relationships you have with the opposite sex you have to be very careful.  Engage in communication under very safe conditions that do not unnecessarily threaten your partner.

And your situation becomes very difficult when every relationship threatens your partner.  It is a balancing act.  You always need to maintain your integrity.  Loyalty to the higher standard (truth, God, and if you want to call it the higher power) is always essential.

You want to remain loyal to your mate but at the same time it is important to keep your sense of perspective.  The only way that can be done is by having outside friends.  Those relationships also prevent you from becoming stale to your partner.  It is a paradox:  you must cleave to your mate but at the same time keep some distance (or proper perspective about each other).  Both partners are enriched by outside friends.

And each time your contact ends with your friend you have something more to share with your partner–maybe a slightly different take on something.  It is, always, as I said a balancing act.  You are always enriched by maintaining your perspective about each other.  The last thing you want to do is have your relationship to become inbred (and stale).  Then your view of each other becomes magnified (instead of realistic).

Tags: against the whole world, balance, cleave to your mate, communication, friends, God, integrity, loyalty, marriage, perspective, relationships, sense of perspective, space between both of you, too much togetherness, truth
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It is so hard to ignore the expectations we have of our friends.  We expect sometimes too much and are disappointed when they don’t meet our expectations.  It is far more easier not to have any expectations of others and rejoice when they exceed them and also feel grateful because if the truth be known each person does what he/she can, when the person can, in their own timing.  If you were to look at your own life, you would see this happening, too.  You have your own timing and give the way you can and give what you can.  You need to give the same right to others.  If you have no expectations, everything someone does for you is totally by grace.  All you really can do is tell another of your needs, desires.  It is up to them how, if and when he/she responds.  Everything is by grace.  And the sooner you understand all that, the easier it is to accept others.  Each person gives what he/she can.

Tags: balance, everything-is-by-grace, expect sometimes too much, expectations, friends, give what we can, giving, God, relationships, time
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It is so easy to view the current events occurring in the world and feel completely helpless.  You really have to back down and look at your life and your personal sphere of influence.  Every day you have contact with people.  You never know for sure how your actions will impact the world.  That is beyond your scope.

To love the people God puts in your circle is no small thing.  It might send small shock waves throughout the universe.  It is true you can not predict the impact of your daily behavior but loving each person who is in your personal sphere of influence is no small thing.  The world could be transformed.  Yes, that might not happen but don’t linger there.  It will only defeat you.

Mother Teresa said do not do big things with love but small things with much love.  It is so easy to get lost in the big picture.  Look at the lives you are intertwined with:  your wife, your kids, your relatives, your friends even the strangers you pass every day.  You never know how a kind or encouraging word can just be the right medicine for some hurting person.

You can transform the world but first learn to do small things with much love.  Life is really composed of many small things.  The big things in life only come along once in a while.  So learn to reach out to each person with love, acceptance and respect.  As Jesus said, “Lose your life and you will find it.”  That does not sound like an exact quote but nevertheless reach out to others.  You will never be disappointed.

Tags: "lose your life and you will find it", a kind or encouraging word, acceptance, change the world, do small things with much love, friends, God, Jesus, kids, live is many small things, love, love people, Mother Teresa, reach out to others, relatives, respect, strangers, wife, world transformed, your sphere of influence
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We learn about others in dribs and drabs.  Sometimes the interactions are seconds here and there.  Maybe minutes if we are lucky.  Maybe, it is better and more meaningful that way, especially if time elapses between contact.  We have more time to take in everything.  As I mentioned in one of the quotes, ‘The value of a man (or in this case it could be a woman) is not in his skin that we should touch him.’  (Thoreau in “Walden”)

(originally written 1/31/9, 8:15 p.m., Saturday)

Tags: friends, God, relationships, the value of a man, Thoreau, Walden
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